


There Is Guilt In Sacrifice

by PrideofMtVernon



Category: Legacies (TV 2018)
Genre: And most importantly, F/F, but they're not super relevant sooo, i guess hope and lizzie are also there, josie is also soft, listen penelope is soft, maybe this could have been teen? but instead we err on the side of caution, they are soft for each other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-16
Updated: 2020-05-16
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:28:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24218131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrideofMtVernon/pseuds/PrideofMtVernon
Summary: Penelope is injured in battle. Josie does not take kindly to attempted martyrdom. They make up.**Pen left for eight months, got back a week ago. The Merge has been solved. So now these disaster bisexuals actually need to face the music. There is also some kissing.
Relationships: Penelope Park/Josie Saltzman
Comments: 24
Kudos: 208





	There Is Guilt In Sacrifice

**Author's Note:**

> Pen left for eight months, got back a week ago. The Merge has been solved. So now these disaster bisexuals actually need to face the music. Gorgomath is some evil giant intent on accumulating magical objects, thus he attacks Salvatore. He's not super important, just thought I'd give you some background.

Penelope Park had many brilliant and clever ideas over the years. Unfortunately, taking a spear through the chest was not one of them. It hurt. _A lot._ It hadn’t been painful at first, but after a minute, when the shock had worn off and the reality of how much blood her body contained started to set in, Penelope Park became aware of just how painful being impaled was. The blood was staining her shirt, which sucked. She really liked this top and she really liked how Josie couldn’t help staring at her when she wore it. The burning sensation in her chest felt hotter than fire and her cheeks felt wet like she’d been crying. She opened her eyes to focus on the shape above her. It belonged to Josie Saltzman whose tears had fallen onto Penelope’s face. _Huh, she hadn’t been crying after all._

“Hey, JoJo.” She grinned at her favorite Saltzman. “Figures, I try to be selfless one time and I get a spear through the chest.” Josie laughed at that. At least, Pen thought it was a laugh, maybe it was a sob. Her chest felt like flames had taken up residence and she grit her teeth trying to breathe through it. “I heard somebody say the hero gets the girl.” Her voice trembled with the pain. “Guess we’ll never know.”

Josie seemed to realize the implications of what Penelope had said. She leaned forward, cupping Penelope’s face in her hands. “You are not allowed to die on me, Penelope. I won’t allow it.”

“What are you going to do about it, Saltzman?”

Penelope didn’t really remember what happened after that. Hope and Lizzie were there chanting furiously. Josie stroked her hair with Penelope’s head in her lap. Josie was going to be so mad at her, but that wasn’t new. She probably wasn’t going to hell so that was a plus. _Martyr’s get a free pass to the pearly gates, right?_

…

Josie was vaguely aware of Hope slouching in the desk chair and of Lizzie standing beside her. Really though, she didn’t care about anything that wasn’t Penelope Park. Penelope Park who was lying, pale and unconscious. Penelope Park, who Josie hadn’t spoken to since her return.

A hand on her shoulder squeezed softly. “She’s going to be okay, Josie. Hope and I are going back to the room. Come get us if you need anything, okay?” She nodded numbly and heard the door shut behind them and then the tears came fast and silent. They burned and spilled onto her cheeks, tracking through the days grime.

Penelope had returned a week ago and Josie hadn’t spoken to her, at least not about what she really wanted. They had been busy, everyone in the school was. But Josie knew part of it was her own fault. She couldn’t handle the possibility of Penelope saying she was too late, that they weren’t going to be anything. So, she avoided the issue entirely. Then Penelope had gotten hurt, bleeding out on the field and wearing that stupid smirk Josie had fallen in love with. At one point, Penelope’s heart had stopped and if Josie wasn’t a stickler for scientific accuracy, she would be sure hers had stopped as well.

The last week had everyone pouring over dusty tomes, searching for answers that might not exist. When they weren’t in the library they had been training outside. The wolves and vamps focused on armed combat. Witches focused on mastering previously-not-taught battle magic. Josie found herself wondering when her school, her childhood home, had become a military academy.

That morning they stood shoulder to shoulder, in the bright morning sun, waiting for the giant, Gorgomath and his horde to make an appearance. She had ended up next to Penelope. She looked beautiful, practically dressed in combat boots and jeans, and that one top that Josie could never help appreciating. She looked every bit the confident, powerful, battle-ready witch, she was. Until Josie saw her eyes and saw her fear and she realized she was just as terrified as the rest of them. “Hey, don’t die out there okay?” She didn’t wait for an answer and stepped forward with Lizzie and Hope to cast a barrier spell.

Now she was alone with an unconscious Park wishing she could go back and start the day again. She reached forward and brushed Penelope’s hair from her face ignoring the faint crimson hue that still covered her hands. She lay down next to Penelope. She couldn’t leave, not yet. Sleep pulled at her and Josie fought it half-heartedly. _Only for a minute then_.

…

Penelope groaned. Everything… _hurt_. Yes, that was an apt description. Perhaps she could come up with something more specific if her head hadn’t felt like someone had taken a hammer to it. Exhausted, she opened her eyes. A glance out the window told her the sun had set hours ago. Dim light from a desk lamp made the room a mess of warm but unintelligible shadows. It took a moment until Penelope realized it was her dorm room. Lying to her right was her favorite Saltzman. Josie’s shoes were still on and she was on top of the covers as if falling asleep had been on accident. She wore wrinkled clothes that smelled like stale battle magic, with smudges of ash marking her face, and her hair in a mess. She looked beautiful. Penelope sat up slowly, groaning and cursing under her breath.

In an instant, a flustered Josie Saltzman was at her side. “Penelope, what are you doing? You need to be resting.”

“I wanted to sit up.” Penelope got her way as Josie moved pillows to cushion her back and then forced her to lie back. “Can I have a glass of water?” The words were hardly out of her mouth when Josie was off the bed and pouring her a glass from a pitcher on her desk.

Josie moved back to her and helped her drink it when her hands shook too much to hold the glass steady. Penelope reached over to turn on her bedside lamp and for a moment the two of them sat quietly. Each watching the other in the brighter light. Josie was looking at her pensively, watching her like she was about to break any second. Penelope couldn’t blame her for that though. Seeing her get impaled and then almost dying probably wasn’t a fantastic experience. Subconsciously Penelope reached a hand to touch where the spear had hit her. Her fingers met cotton. Specifically, the worn cotton of a faded Salvatore t-shirt that was reserved for movie nights and lazy Saturday mornings. “Where’s my button down?”

Josie raised an eyebrow, no doubt questioning her priorities. “It was kind of a mess, Pen. Between the spear and the, um, the blood, it wasn’t really worth saving.”

“Damn, I looked cute in that top.” Josie laughed at that, ever so slightly. Penelope smiled, smug with pride to be the cause of it. “So how did I end up wearing a t shirt, Josie? I noticed I’m not wearing my jeans either. Care to explain that?”

Josie blushed furiously and began stammering about “the blood” and “your wound” and “jeans just didn’t really seem like they would be super comfortable.”

“JoJo,” laughed Penelope. “I was only kidding. Thank you for taking care of me.”

“Oh. Any time.” Josie stared at her hands, fidgeting and refusing to meet Penelope’s eyes. Penelope wanted to pull her closer, kiss the pout from her lips, make it so any tears falling were from laughter. But they weren’t there yet, and Penelope wouldn’t risk pushing her. She had been back for a week and she still didn’t know where she stood. An exasperated Hope Mikaelson had assured her between sparring sessions, that Josie was still very much in love of with her. Looking at her now, Penelope didn’t doubt that. She wondered though, if that love would mean Josie holding her close again or if Penelope should resign herself to a broken heart.

“You should probably get changed too. You can grab something from my dresser. There ought to be something for your absurdly long limbs in there.” Josie smiled at the jab.

“It’s fine. I can get something from my room. I should probably shower too, and you need to rest so…” Josie trailed off.

Josie didn’t want to stay. Which is fine, of course. They’re not together. She doesn’t owe Penelope anything. That fact that she stayed this long was just because Josie Saltzman is wonderful and kind and had nothing to do with Penelope specifically. Right. “Pen, you okay?”

She was fine.

Her heart felt like it had been shattered into a million pieces.

But she was fine.

She can tell Josie to go. “Could you stay here tonight?” _Nice going, Park._ But then Josie was agreeing with something akin to relief in her voice. Josie searched Penelope’s dresser for something to wear and coming up with too short pajama pants and a loose t shirt. Penelope pretended to find her bed sheets incredibly interesting as Josie got changed.

Josie moved across the room, switching off the desk lamp and slipping beneath the covers. Penelope turned off her bedside lamp, immersing them in darkness. Josie moved closer to Penelope, pressing close resting her head by her shoulder. Josie smelled like magic and beneath it was her shampoo and the sandalwood lotion she liked. Penelope breathed it in slowly, relaxed in the way that only Josie could make her. They were closer than was strictly necessary, but Penelope found Josie’s hand anyway linking their fingers and holding tight. She wouldn’t let go. Not again. As sleep pulled at her, it occurred to Penelope that perhaps she wasn’t the only one between the two who had wanted Josie to stay.

…

Penelope woke in the early afternoon. Healing magic was a useful, lifesaving, irreplaceable form of magic, but the amount of it used yesterday strained her body. Repairing all of the damaged tissue was hardly a walk in the park and while Hope and Lizzie had stopped once the riskiest parts of recovery had been taken care of, it was still going to take the witch a few days to regain energy and maybe longer until magic use was advisable.

Swaying slightly, she rose from bed and gathered her toiletries and towel.

The bathroom was empty. Everyone else was down at lunch or cleaning up from yesterday’s mess. Penelope entered the first stall and locked the door closed, hanging up her towel, and placing her shower crate on the floor. Her hands shook slightly as she grasped the edge of her t shirt. She slipped it over her head and looked down, nervous for the sight awaiting her. Angry, red skin sat in the middle of her chest in an area the size of her fist. Purple and blue bruising spattered around it and she shuddered to think what it would have been like without the healing magic.

The thought was overwhelming. _She almost died._ She thought she was prepared for the situation going into that fight. She had thought it through and made the call. Somebody needed to jump in front of that spear, and she wasn’t about to ask anybody else to do it. But then she remembered Josie above her as she lay bleeding on the field and Josie’s tears falling hot and wet onto her face. She hadn’t made things right between them, hadn’t told the girl what she really wanted.

She shook her head trying to clear her thoughts. _You’re alive, Park. One step at a time and you’ll be fine._ She turned the water on and stepped under the spray relaxing as warm water fell against her back. It washed away the dried blood turning the water red as it swirled towards the drain. It washed away the ache in her shoulders and the guilt of almost dying.

…

It was three days after the giant attack and Penelope was in her room with the windows open to let the sunshine in. Josie sat next to her on the bed, both of them leaning against the headboard, both of them dressed in soft pants and worn t shirts. It was safe and separated from the rest of the world and Penelope could have stayed there forever.

She could feel Josie shifting next to her. She would be about to say something and then decide against it, turning back to the book on her lap. Then she would repeat the cycle and had been doing so for the last ten minutes. “What is it, JoJo?”

Josie looked surprised and then maybe a little frustrated with being caught. But she only shook her head. “It’s nothing.”

“Josie, come on.” Taller girl only stared harder at her book, eyes moving across the page, reading nothing. Penelope watched her for a moment waiting for an answer before turning back to her own book. Josie would say it when she was ready, and it was no use to try getting it out of her before that.

“Why did you do it?” Josie still wasn’t looking at her, eyes fixed on worn pages, worrying her lips between her teeth.

“Do what?” Penelope was good at reading Josie, but she was a witch, not a psychic.

Josie huffed, closing her book, and turning completely to face Penelope. “Why did you jump in front of the spear? Lizzie found your notes. I get that the spear was magic. I know we needed to separate it from Gorgomath, but why did it have to be you? The spear needed a victim, why not Landon, who can, you know, come back from the dead? Or a wolf or vampire? Both species heal faster than witches.” Josie was flushed and fighting to keep her voice steady. “I specifically asked you not die- “

“JoJo, come on, I didn’t die- “

“Yeah actually you did. For a solid couples of seconds. It was terrifying.” Josie’s eyes flashed between anger and fear and Penelope felt the guilt rise in her throat. “Why did it have to be you?” Her voice cracked on the last word. Penelope moved to take Josie’s hand, but the siphon jerked away. “Answer the question, Penelope.”

“The spear doesn’t just need a victim. The language was very specific, even if it was written in 5th century English. The spear needs to hit someone who is willing to lose everything for what they love. It needed to be risking a selfless death, but one that sacrifices everything.” She doesn’t look at Josie. Worried that if she did, she wouldn’t be able to keep talking. “Landon wouldn’t work because he wouldn’t really be risking anything. The wolves and vamps are far more likely to survive it as you pointed out, so the spell wouldn’t really work with them either. At least, I wasn’t certain it would work with them and I knew the spell would work if I did it.”

She chanced a glance a look at Josie, who had remained quiet. Brown eyes filled with tears and Penelope wanted to hit herself. She had promised herself she wouldn’t be the cause of those tears, not again. “It wasn’t our first attack strategy. It wasn’t Plan B or even C. But nothing else was working and people were getting hurt. I couldn’t very well ask someone else to sacrifice themselves, so I jumped in front of you. I’m sorry I put you through that, but I also need you to know I would do it again.”

Josie stared at for a moment deep in thought. Penelope needed to hear her say something, anything, but she held her tongue. “What kind of witch enchants a spear so that it’s only disabled with attempted martyrdom?”

“Witches can be a little dramatic sometimes. Or so I’m told.” Josie gave her a watery smile and Penelope shot one back.

“I’m glad you’re not dead.”

“Josette, you have such a way with words.”

“Shut up. You know what I mean.”

Penelope did know what she meant. _I’m glad you’re not dead. It’s easier to breathe when you’re next to me. I’m pretty sure soulmates are bullshit, but I’m also pretty sure you’re mine. I love you._

…

The older students of the Salvator School took advantage of warm weather and a cloudless Saturday night to occupy the Old Mill. Drinks were poured and spells casted as wolves, vampires, and witches crowded together gossiping, dancing, and, on occasion, sneaking off to find an unoccupied tree with their hookup. Penelope Park, despite her newly regained status as head witch in charge and her love for teenage recklessness, was not participating. Instead, she was lying on the school roof, eyes fixed on the stars.

“Thought maybe I would find you up here.” Recognizing the voice, she didn’t bother looking up, instead waiting for Josie to join her. “Didn’t feel like partying? Your minions are lost without you, you know.”

Penelope felt a smile tug at her lips, sparing a glance to Josie. “They survived without me for eight months, I think they can handle it.” Something on Josie’s face shifted and Penelope cursed silently. Her minions weren’t the only ones she left for eight months.

Josie sighed. “I’m sorry for that. I should have fought for you harder. Not just with Belgium, but when we broke up too.”

Not for the first time that week, Penelope wondered what they were. They had slept in the same bed every night this week. It was explainable the first couple times. If Penelope needed something in the middle of the night, she wasn’t really in shape to take care of it herself. But this morning she woke up with Josie’s arm tight around her waist and no space left between them. And even when they weren’t sleeping, they weren’t really separated for more than an hour. “But I’ll fight for you now.”

“What?” Penelope asked, startled. Obviously, she heard her, but her heart was hammering, and her palms were sweaty, and the unflappable Penelope Park was nowhere to be found when Josie Saltzman threw her for a spin. Josie sat up and Penelope followed suit.

“I’m in love with you.” Josie looked nervous but her voice was firm, and she held Penelope’s gaze. “I never stopped loving you.”

“Wait, wait hold on a second.” Penelope felt panic in her chest growing steadily. This is what she wanted. Isn’t this what she wanted? “I just…You never stopped loving me so, what’s different now? What changes about us?”

“I want to date you. I want to be your girlfriend. I want to hold your hand in the dining hall and on the way to class and I want to be able to kiss you whenever I want. I want you to flirt with me at the most inappropriate times and make out in the library when we should be working.” Josie cheeks had turned a bright pink, but she kept on. “Call it whatever you want: exclusive, official.” She smirked slightly, “going steady. I love you, Penelope Park. I’m all in.”

Penelope gaped for a moment, trying to transform everything she felt into intelligible thought, vaguely aware of Josie reaching forward and wiping away tears she didn’t know she shed. “There’s no way it can be that easy.”

Josie raised an eyebrow. “Can’t it? Our lives are chaotic and messy, but none of that seems to matter when I’m with you. You’re the only thing that has ever really made sense.” Penelope could tell Josie was getting nervous. Even if Penelope is and always has been head over heels for Josie Saltzman, staring and saying nothing is probably not the best response. “Unless, I read the situation wrong and-“ Penelope lunged forward, kissing Josie firmly.

“You didn’t.” She kissed her again. “I’ll be your girlfriend.” She kissed her once more. “And I love you too.” She leaned forward pressing her lips to Josie’s. Josie who smelled like sandalwood lotion and tasted like cherry lip-gloss. She kissed her delicately with a hand on her jaw. Josie kissed her back far less gently, with her hand on the back of Penelope’s neck pulling her down.

It was overwhelming. Wonderful, but devastating. She didn’t know what she wanted to touch first, and Josie was beneath her looking beautiful. “Hey.” Josie’s hands were in her hair again, scratching soothingly and playing with her curls. “Don’t over think it.” Penelope leaned down, tasting cherries and then trailing kisses from her jaw, down her neck to her collar bone.

Josie’s hands traveled down her back and slipped beneath her shirt to trace the skin at her waist. Every place Josie’s hands touched seemed to burn. She would be embarrassed at how quickly she had gotten worked up, but then Josie let out a moan when Penelope bit down on her lip and her concerns fell away, replaced with a single-minded goal of hearing Josie make that sound again. Her leg slipped between Josie’s, pressing against her center. Josie groaned softly, stifling it poorly with her face tucked into Penelope’s shoulder. “Pen, do you maybe want to,” she broke off, swearing under her breath as Penelope shifted her leg again. “We need to take this inside.” Before Penelope could distract her again, Josie was out from under her, on her feet and attempting to adjust her appearance which might have worked if her lips hadn’t been swollen, if her eyes weren’t blown, if there wasn’t a hickey blooming just above her collar.

Josie grabbed Penelope’s hand, pulling her to her feet, dragging her back inside and along a narrow hallway until they stopped at Penelope’s door. Josie fumbled with the lock and dragged Penelope through when the door opened. Then there was hot breath in between desperate kisses, wandering hands, and a steady path to Penelope’s bed.

Josie had lost her shirt along the way and her chest was heaving beneath the black bra while she tried to catch her breath. Penelope worked across the pale skin of chest sucking, biting and licking. She had forgotten how intoxicating Josie Saltzman really was. If one kiss left Penelope breathless, what they were doing now may very well be her cause of death. Josie was soft, and pale, and hers to mark. She would gasp and whimper when Penelope’s mouth met her skin and Penelope had decided (rationally and with serious thought) that eliciting those noises was her divine calling.

Josie’s hands wandered, one grasping as black curls and the other slipping beneath Penelope’s shirt. Nails dragged along her back and Penelope shivered. Then Josie grasped at the hem of Penelope’s shirt to get it off and panic enveloped her. She sat back suddenly, straddling Josie, with a hand wrapped around the wrist at her waist. “Wait, fuck, um…” Why was she panicking? This was Josie who she trusted completely and unwaveringly, but her heart was rattling around in her chest as alarm bells sounded in her head.

“Pen, it’s okay.” Josie sat up, resting her hands on Penelope’s legs, drawing small soothing circles. “Penelope, look at me.” Josie’s eyes were soft and understanding and her heart seemed to settle. “What happened?”

“It’s just the scar, and it’s not exactly nice looking.”

“Shit, Pen, I’m sorry. I didn’t even think.” Penelope leaned forward, relaxing in Josie’s embrace, hiding her face in Josie’s shoulder. “You know that won’t change anything right? You’re still beautiful and I still want you.” Sensing Penelope was about to object, Josie pressed forward. “Don’t get me wrong, it sucks that it’s there and if I could take you pain away I would. But it’s also a part of you, and I want to know _all_ of you, including scars and bruises. Besides, you did get it saving my life so…what kind of girlfriend would I be if I didn’t say thank you?”

Penelope smiled at that. _Girlfriend._ She let out a breath trying to maintain some semblance of calm before pulling off her shirt and undoing her bra. She kept her gaze fixed on her hands the fidgeted between the two of them. She heard Josie intake of breath at the sight and closed her eyes. She didn’t want to see whatever look Josie was wearing. Then she felt gentle lips on her skin, so light she could have imagined it. But then Josie’s hands were on her chest tracing the bruising with kisses close behind.

Rationally, she knew it was absurd, but it felt like the pain was draining from her body with every touch. Josie kissed her and Penelope could feel the bruises lessen and the angry red skin fade to only a pink. Josie’s lips found her own again and they lay back down, less hurried this time, but with the same intensity. She loved Josie Saltzman, with all of her obnoxious, selfish, evil heart, and she wasn’t going to let Josie forget that.

…

Josie lay on her side, head propped up on her left hand, while her right traced the wound on Penelope’s chest. She kept her touch feather light so she wouldn’t press the bruises. She couldn’t believe there was a time when she thought Penelope was selfish. She couldn’t believe the girl in bed with her thought Penelope was selfish.

“That speech you gave on the roof.”

“Yeah?”

“Did you practice it in the mirror, or did you rehearse it in front of Lizzie?”

She rolled her eyes. “You’re an ass, Pen. And no, I did not rehearse it for Lizzie.”

“So, the mirror then.”

“No.” Josie’s ears burned, completely ruining any chance to get the upper hand in their banter. “There was rehearsal involved, just not a mirror. The was also supposed to be, I don’t know, candles or something. But then I was there, and you were there and it kind of just spilled out of me.” Josie watched Penelope’s face as she let her hand wander down the other girl’s stomach, nails scraping ever so lightly, and then she trailed along the inside of her thighs. Penelope Park, who was supposed to be above everything, who was supposedly untouchable, jerked her hips towards Josie’s fingers. She smirked. “Guess it worked out though.”

Penelope rolled her eyes and captured Josie’s wandering hand to bring it to her lips. “I love you, JoJo.”

“Love you too, Pen.”

This was her favorite version of Penelope Park. Still teasing and smirking and smug, but there wasn’t any malice in her words. Her walls were down and her need for control seemed to melt away. It always made Josie torn between two choices. Did she want to show the world how magnificent and kind and lovely Penelope Park was? Or did she want to hide the two of them away, protect what they had found from prying eyes, and learn every facet and secret Penelope Park had? Josie sighed content and lay down, pressing her lips to Penelope’s bare shoulder. There would be time for both of those things, she decided. The Merge had been rendered obsolete and there was no looming apocalypse to be found. She was going to spend all her years with Penelope Park and no supernatural destiny was going to keep her from that.

**Author's Note:**

> "You died? When I specifically asked you not to?!" - Josie probably.  
> Hi, you made it! thanks for reading. All comments and kudos are appreciated. maybe comment your favorite line? Also would you characterize this as fluff, or angst, or...?


End file.
